Clockwork Grat

I am grateful for my littlest one sleeping for 4 hours straight today! She is so grizzly and clingy at the moment it's slightly overwhelming (!) and I had decided to stagger the girls sleep times so help me get through the day on my own. Well this worked out perfectly and I even managed to get a 20 minute power nap in myself! Ahh it's nice when things just work:-)

A couple of jobs done..well almost!

I am grateful that I am about 80% of the way through packing for next week AND I finished my ironing... that is such a good feeling!

Sweet Dreams

I am particularly grateful for my nice warm bed. Ahhhh it is so nice to snuggle up into it each night...I only wish I could spend more time there!!!!! Ahhh I am so blessed to have this lovely safe and comfy place to rest my tired body and dream the night away!

Pancakes 'n more!

O.k so I have wanted to grat all week, but unfortunately I have not had one moment spare in which to do so - even as I write this first sentence I am being interrupted with a small voice calling out "Mummy I am too hot in my jama's suit!" So anyhoo I'm back, here I am with one enormous grat!!

First things first, today my hubby and I had our first 'day off' without both the kids, just to hang out together!!! Well I think this was one of the first times that I can recall when we didn't have either of the kids and we were out on our own for no other reason than to just 'hang out' all day!!' So this is the essence of my gratitude for today. First and foremost I am so grateful for my beautiful friend and her husband for offering to have the girls on their weekend. I could never have asked them to give up this time just so I could go and have a break and yet, they insisted on it - which made me feel really relaxed in knowing that they wanted to have the girls. They truly are an amazing and generous couple. I felt really comfortable leaving the girls with them , even when our baby has been not herself this week, getting teeth and being very grizzly. The kids all had a brilliant time and it was so cute to pick the girls up and hear of the adventures they had had during the day...all the while feeling so relaxed within myself! What a change from the frazzled Mum (and Dad) who dropped them off this morning!!

Secondly I am grateful for the generous gift we were given to go to the pancake parlour. This is not someone where I would choose to go normally to eat, but it was a really  fun opportunity to experience it, without having the pay the exorbitant amount they expect you to pay for a couple of pancakes!! LOL It was yummy tho:)

Finally I am grateful for my sweet husband, who was just a crack up to hang out with today. We spent time just walking through the Wilson Botantic Gardens and had a really fun time being reminded of how footloose and fancy free we were all those years ago when we used to date and hang out in parks, canoodling and mucking around! What a refreshing experience to just have no deadline (or not until 7pm at night anyway!!) We checked out a few different cafe's, went to an old favorite lookout and ate turkish bread with smoked prosciutto (OMG that what to die for) and drank appletise! Ahhhhhh does it get any better?! All the while enjoying the sounds of silence and of course our own chatter! No interruptions, no crying, no tantrums, no stinky nappies, just us! 

Yep I have had a fantastic 'grattable' day!!

Smiles, Mel

Feeling unwell...

So today I have been feeling a little unwell.  I woke up feeling nauseous and couldn't really shake that 'sick' pit in my stomach for the day.  Anyway, despite all this there is so much to be thankful for like the fact that our two eldest children were away having a sleep over and my mother-in-law (bless her) insisted on having them stay an extra night.  I also feel grateful that I was able to have lots of sleep during the day, sip soup and take it easy.  Finally as I start to improve, I am glad for the clean sheets on my bed, clean towels on the rack, wheat bags (3 positioned to warm the whole body) and cozy pajamas.  I have every chance of feeling so much better tomorrow and for that I am grateful! 

Over...

I am so grateful to have my exams over, and for the lovely lunch shared with the 20 people in my course at the cafe at uni today. I am really appreciating being part of a smaller cohort and the opportunity that brings for getting to know everyone by name and on some level!

Growing up so fast...

Today my littlest had his 8 month check up with the maternal health nurse.  I am so grateful for this beautiful boy.  He had already been in and out of the car three times for the kinder drop off, swimming and then this appointment all before lunch time (on top of having 2 cat naps... both interrupted). And yet despite all this he patiently let Gillian, our nurse, poke and prod at him, smiled sweetly, passed all his '8 month assessments' (like transferring a block from one hand to the other, turning his head when he heard his name, sitting up unassisted etc) with charm and charisma.   

I know I'm biased but I think he is such a superstar.  He rarely cracks it and when he does, he has every reason to with all the rushing around that he is subjected to.

So for today, I'm grateful for his easy-going nature, his delightful laughter and his cheeky smile that continue to remind me how blessed I am that he is in our family.

 

NB His head (not surprisingly) was in the 90th percentile BUT so was his height so that's apparently okay LOL.  There just must be lots of brains in there hee hee!

  

‘Faith like potatoes’ is an inspirational movie based on a true story that challenges you to believe beyond the noise and expectations of the world. I watched this movie on the weekend and was so inspired.

The movie is basically about a farmer wanting to plant potatoes but due to the drought it would be impossible to harvest. God speaks to the farmer and tells him to plant potatoes despite the weather. So off course come people who doubt and mock because well it’s impossible!! And basically tell him to stop believing for what can’t be done. Now the interesting thing about potatoes is that you don’t watch them grow and see how well they are doing, they are grown underground, so it’s only at harvest time that you will see if you have any potatoes. So the farmer plants the seeds in pretty much dust because there was no rain to even soften the soil. That alone would have been enough to deter me! When it was time to harvest and plough the field, not only was their potatoes, but the biggest potatoes and so many potatoes!! The farmer just believed, even when he could not see anything, there was a drought and the world said it could not be done.

This challenged me so much, especially during a time when the world declares to be in a global recession, a time when people are losing their jobs and a time when it can be really difficult to find jobs. So as the market tightens I have found myself at times listening to the world and beginning to lower my expectation and conforming to this global economic situation. Yet through it all God still calls me to believe, have faith and trust for the best job I have ever had. Believe even when it does not look like it’s possible because the harvest time is near!

So i am grateful for this movie which has reinspired me to believe for greater and to have ‘faith like potatoes’!! As the movie promotes, ‘the seed for a great miracle lies not in difficulty but impossibility’.

Latte, Rain and Study

I am grateful for a nice warm Latte with my big sis and the gang this morning after brunch. At my favourite cafe and served in a bowl (perfect!)

Also grateful for a nice rainy day perfect motivation for me to study this afternoon - grateful that I was able to be so productive and get a lot of study done!

Grateful also for getting groceries today (as we were totally out) and now having lots of healthy food to choose from over the last few days of exams.

Be Thankful

Be thankful that you don't already have everything you desire,

If you did, what would there be to look forward to? 

Be thankful when you don't know something

For it gives you the opportunity to learn. 

Be thankful for the difficult times.

During those times you grow. 

Be thankful for your limitations

Because they give you opportunities for improvement. 

Be thankful for each new challenge

Because it will build your strength and character. 

Be thankful for your mistakes

They will teach you valuable lessons. 

Be thankful when you're tired and weary

Because it means you've made a difference. 

It is easy to be thankful for the good things.

A life of rich fulfillment comes to those who are

also thankful for the setbacks. 

GRATITUDE can turn a negative into a positive.

Find a way to be thankful for your troubles

and they can become your blessings.

~ Author Unknown ~

Family and Friends

I am grateful for some nice time spent with family and friends today. My sister is visiting from interstate and it was lovely to have everyone there together. We had the fire going, sitting on the deck watching the rain and sipping hot chocolate (or wine!). Also got to chat to my little sis who is overseas tonight which is always really great. So overall a nice day with family.

Fair Trade

I am grateful for the new coffee we've discovered.  We've always used Coffex in our machine but this one is organic and fairtrade and VERY yummy.

I think it's wonderful how many new fairtrade items I'm seeing on the supermarket shelves now.  I bought some chocolate from Coles the other day...the Cocolo brand. I am grateful that companies are making these products readily available and supporting workers in developing countries.  Yay.

FYI:

Fairtrade is about better prices, decent working conditions, local sustainability, and fair terms of trade for farmers and workers in the developing world. By requiring companies to pay sustainable prices (which must never fall lower than the market price), Fairtrade addresses the injustices of conventional trade, which traditionally discriminates against the poorest, weakest producers. It enables them to improve their position and have more control over their lives.

Shells

Here comes the devotional, get a coffee girls.. for God's little words through His creation.  I often come to writing my grat and start to write something kinda superficial, that I am thankful for, but that doesn’t really touch where I'm at on that day.  I'm sure that’s a protective, pride thing on my part- not wanting to worry anyone and let anyone see the valley that I'm in at the moment.  But this morning as I took a walk with God He was speaking to me about this.  Just maybe if I'm really truthful, my words could help others, maybe some of you guys feel variations of this in your walks. Maybe I'm being disobedient by not sharing some of these thoughts as the spin God gives me on this may help you also. So I resigned to swallow my pride and the fear that I have of you guys looking at me going "wow she’s got issues!!" and just be honest. I hope that’s ok!

 

So my grat/reflection/devotion this morning is about my new found shell collection! Each day as I walk along the water up here, I collect a shell that is an indication of how I'm feeling that day.  One I picked up the other day was really small and clean- how I felt, small and somewhat insignificant in it all, but like God was bringing me down to the bottom of the valley to wash me clean.  Today’s shell was what triggered this grat.  It's one of those swirly ones, quite beautiful really, it’s much bigger and amazingly its outer rim is still intact, all its edges are there yet as you look at it you can see many holes. Either it’s been eaten away (does anything eat shells??) or bashed up against some rocks and debris for some time to make it like that.  Dear God, I thought, that is so me!!!

 

I'm keeping the shells, and making a picture out of them.  I intend to keep them to remind me that as each day passes, it’s a day I've got through and don’t have to go back to; but mostly it's a day that God has got me through.  I intend to look at them one day, from a happier place in life (cause I know God will get me there!) and remember how it was His unfailing love that brought me through this time, that He was the only constant in life that would always be with me.

What’s in the meaning of a name?

You know, my name (Tamara) means "palm tree on a hill". For years I’ve joked with friends about how hilarious and tragic it was to have a name that meant this. Anyway, I always thought, man that kinda sucks, other people have names meaning 'gift from God", "powerful leader" and here I am ‘palm tree on a hill’! Whooppeee! Intense!

Funny though, as time has gone on, God's showed me that palm trees plant their roots firmly in their foundations. They are resilient, strong and in times of hurricane and storms, they are often the only things left standing. They survive times of drought and famine and stretch their leaves up to God still. Like anything though, you remove the foundation- you uproot them, they die. They need this for life. How very cool this is huh! At my house now I am surrounded by palm trees. How gracious is God to give me this visual reminder! So my faith journey is that, thank God that He provides the foundation! I have so many stories of God's grace and mercy to me on my walk- He blows me away!...hahaha, but not literally cause I’m a palm tree….

i angel

So after two massive 14 and 16 hr days and a lot of stress with work this week, as I got off another plane last night, SOMEHOW I turned my iphone on and dropped it and got off the plane- leaving it where I was sitting.  I walked almost all the way down to the carousel to get my bag and thought "where's my phone" and then (imagine this) just propped in a corner unloading all the stuff out of my hand luggage to try to find it.
 
Normally I'm really careful with these things, so I figured it had just slipped down into one of the pockets...but NO!!!! So, a little stressed, I walked back to the plane- and said a couple of SOS prayers to God "God I know its a material thing, but pleeeeaassseee, half my life is on that phone"....the logistics of losing it were creeping in....
 
A nice employee went to have a look on the plane for me...but NO PHONE. I had rung it already with no answer, so I tried again.....YES!! Someone answered.  This man had been sitting behind me and picked up my phone, the hostess (can you believe this!) said just take it to the carousel to see if you can find her- I think that was really dumb but anyway....so this man, who wasn't even waiting for luggage as he only had carry on stuff, said he would wait there for me to come. I was sooooooo grateful, as it is brand new and would have cost me LOTS of money to replace....aside from losing all my numbers etc etc etc
 
He was so nice, I thanked him profusely. So all the way home I was just blown away by the kindness of this stranger, I've asked God about 500 times since to bless this kind man in the white and floral flower shirt (yep!!) that someone would do something really kind for him this weekend and that God would just bless him abundantly! This is still my prayer.
 
Funny though, it really altered my mindset- Don’t get me wrong, I've been really happy this week, amidst some challenging work stuff. God's really provided AGAIN!! But it did make me want to love others more- unconditionally- just as I had been shown kindness. Another good life lesson, so I thank God for this perspective; for teaching me another valuable lesson and for my floral i-phone angel! What a legend!
 
 
Life is an opportunity, benefit from it. Life is beauty, admire it. Life is bliss, taste it. Life is a dream realize it. Life is a challenge, meet it. Life is a duty, complete it.

                                                                                       Mother Teresa

He is there!

My plane that left one of the domestic airports at 6am this morning (meaning up at 4am!!!!) had to do an emergency landing because they had some "systems fail"- we got off the plane to see hydraulic fluids pouring out of the bottom.  Actually today girls I thought I may not be here to write this.  Kinda weird thought huh...but read on...

 

As we dumped fuel (I think) for some time as we circled in the air and as the tension rose from the passengers and staff, I sat and reflected on my life. I had 25 minutes and believe me when you're in a situation where you think, "Hey this plane could actually crash here" it gets the thoughts going even at 6am! Had I accomplished anything? Did I have major regrets? What would I change? How would people remember me? 

 

I concluded several things, that whilst the passenger next to me MAY remember me as the girl with the unusually puffy eyes! :(.....thankfully I regret little- though I have made many mistakes and have learnt much.  I also concluded that if I did die (a bit morbid sorry I know) that my family and friends would all know how much I loved them and valued them- this was a really great thought. I also thought "whoopppee I could go to heaven" and admittedly liked the idea selfishly of not having any more sadness in my heart, though I didn't want my family to be sad- a tricky one.  I decided that though I enjoy my job, it didn't really deserve much air time (excuse the pun!).  What amazing perspective such situations give us.  

 

...so as negative as this 'grat' is sounding right now...

 

I am really grateful for this time of reflection; 

 

I'm also grateful that we didn't crash!!!!; 

 

I'm grateful for those that I love in life and that I am loved in return- that's such a blessing 

 

but mostly I'm grateful for my God who is bigger than any plane worries, boy worries, sadness, bills, pain or anything  else that we spend our energy on.  

 

I'm grateful that I know that He always listens to the cries of my heart- both good and bad, and that He never tires of this even if very patient friends may in time. 

 

I'm grateful that though there are many times that I can't feel Him, that I Hknow he is there whether I'm circling in the air, crying!! or laughing with my friends.  

 

I'm grateful that as I faced a moment of 'potential eternity' that He gave me peace in my heart.

 

Bless you girls, sorry for the intense grats, but I think God's really working on me at the moment, so a little warning- the may continue...

The Lizard

 

...now the lizard...as I sit here on my daybed on the back porch (Andie's fav place at my house) I am watching my new resident blue tongue lizard, who I've just decided to call Harry, patiently wait for food- insects etc that he is basically stalking.  He was here earlier this week, before I left for conference.  Now for those "melbournites" in our group, lizards aren't exactly an every day occurance in melbourne backyards, at least not blue tongues, but in QLD I have seen lots of lizards, skinks etc and the odd blue tongue. Harry though, clearly has been enjoying his new home in my backyard (well at least for now before Mille my dog returns, when I have asked him to move on!...we will see how that goes..).

Anyway, I was watching him earlier in the week, and I was overwhelmed by his patience.  This dude just waits. He just sits, so still that if you weren't looking for Him you would actually pass him by. You guys know of my journey recently, lets be honest there's been a few rocks on my path of late (maybe a couple boulders also) and a few of you know how I am seeking God's direction on where I need to go to from here etc, and that God has merely said to me (many times in the last month,though different media and people- another good story for another day) "Be still and know that I am God".

 

So that's all I have been doing, everytime I get discouraged I here a song with these words; or a sermon; or someone random says to me, "Just be Still"...God is so gracious.  So now He has used Harry to convey this message. I watched Harry earlier this week, and again this morning, just sit PAINFULLY still, waitng for the right time to move. Sometimes he would just incline his eyes up, watching and listening. It again dawned on me that I need to be like my new mate Harry! Still, silent, patient, waiting, inclining my eyes and ears toward heaven.  How great is our God to use even these small creatures around us to bring His messages.  How important it is to obey.

 

As i sit here this morning and look out, I notice the beautiful frangipani tree that my neighbour has, that is flowering- my favourite tree; and as I am writing this I watch a blue butterfly- hilariously the first I've seen up here, and my favourite for a long time, flies by.  God gives us so many messages in the small things, I wonder how many I've missed in the past?

 

So that's my thought girls, I hope you gain something out of this. My personal prayer is "God, please make me more like Harry, patient and aware...but perhaps hold the somewhat unattractive physique and looks cause let's be honest, Harry's not exactly easy on the eye :)

 

Bless you girlies! I have attached a pic of my new mate for you all to share! Feel free to stick Him on the fridge if you need to grow in this area too!

Steady Gain

I am grateful for the steady improvement in weight and health of my friends little girl who was born premie about a month ago (three months early). She is up from 1200g at birth to about 2400g. What a little champ!

Losing My Mind

Lately I've had this phase of losing things. It's truly driving me crazy.  I'm usually so careful with where I put things. I like order.  I've often said the state of my house is the state of my mind.  Usually when my house is a complete mess...well....you know that the old 'upstairs department' is in a bit of a state too!
 
As I travel so much with work, I tend to have a certain order of doing things. When I stay in a hotel, I generally don't use the wardrobes- I'm not one of these "unpack everything when I arrive" people, if I was I think I'd spend the other half of my time doing this! I only ever use the middle section of my case, so I can lock it.  I never use the outer zipper compartments as I know people who had had things stolen out of there before.  Sounds kinda silly in some ways huh? But for me it's all about boundaries and order.  I keep these 'rules' if you like, things are generally ok.
 
However lately, I have lost two pairs of perscription glasses (in 6 months!); one pair of my expensive favourite sunnies (that were a bit of a 'significant, symbolic purchase 2 years ago for me) and my FAVOURITE cream jacket.  I wear this thing everywhere, its perfect for work and casual and I simply love it.  I was thinking about it the other day with a "where did I put it" kinda moment, and just couldn't figure out what I'd done with it. SO annoying!! I really wanted to take it travelling on holidays too. This morning I woke up thinking about it, and still annoyed with myself for losing ANOTHER item that I love. Not only is it expensive but it's always you're favourite things that you lose. I still have my first dodgy pair of prescription specs! I mean, seriously, what's all that about!! Drives me CRAZY!!
 
So this morning, I'm sitting having my coffee on my back porch (my favourite spot in my house!!) and I said "God, please, where is my jacket? How do I keep losing things?"...and guess what...my mind went immediately to the front zipper section of one of my suitcases (gulp!), and I remembered that I had quickly 'shoved' the jacket in there before I jumped on a flight so I wouldn't have to carry it- I have broken one of my "I never put things in the front of the case" rules. So off I trot and ...ta da...there it is!
 
I'm SO grateful for starters, even though it is just a 'thing' in my life, but it's a favourite thing you know. I could have lived without it, but I would have been disappointed. (let's not talk about all the glasses that still remain AWOL!!)  But you know girls, what it taught me- or rather reminded me- was not about the material stuff but about my boundaries.  I create order and boundaries in my life for a reason.   God creates them for us. When I break them, I suffer the consequences, big or small.  God doesn't want me to hurt, feel sad or be disappointed, thats why He creates guidelines- for our protection. To guard our hearts.  Those who have kids, discipline them not because they enjoy it, but because they want their kids to be the best they can be. God doesn't create boundaries to be a tirant.  Boundaries are healthy and protective, and He loves us enough to let us decide whether we will step over them or not.  
 
The symbolism really hit me on this today.  Thanks God, for that reminder.
P.s ohhh, and THANKS for my jackets' return  to the fold  :)

Birthday, bargains and bed...

I am grateful for my big bro who had his birthday today, and SO grateful to have him as part of my life.

Also grateful for a bargain on some comfy trakkies and sweater I bought today all of $10 each (despite the sweater having $30 on the pricetag!).

Grateful for my new comfy clothes and for a nice warm cup of herbal tea before bed.

Friendship Grat

Friends come in so many different varieties.  Like this poem says..

Friends are like flowers

each unique in their own way,
put them all together
what a wonderful bouquet.

    Some are really brilliant
full of light sharp and clear,
while other are more subdued
to both you can adhere.

Sorry author unknown.

This week I have been especially touched by all the different types of friends I have in my life that all have a vital (yet different) part to play.

On Monday I caught up with 3 gorgeous mums at Marvellous Mums that have all completely impacted me and changed me in some way along with my mum, who comes to support me- which is her gift of love and friendship.  I also had a phone message from probably my oldest childhood friend who is so special in my life and an encouraging email from another wonderful girlfriend.

On Tuesday I had chats with some newly formed friends in my daughter's swimming class... don't know much about them yet so we are in the very early stages still but they are definitely "friendly".  I also had emails from my sister-in-law (a treasured friend) as well as the unexpected gifts (which I mentioned in my last grat) from our friends expecting twins.  

On Wednesday I saw my sister, again one of my best friends, as well as received a special gift in the mail from a friend I met traveling over 5 years ago... another surprise package.

And then today, I had a really great chat with a friend of mine at mother's group. Although we have seen each other for short periods over the past few months, we'd not had a 'proper' deep and meaningful conversation in a while.  It was so awesome to sit and talk, talk, talk.  We had so much going in our lives in common and yet so much is also completely different however it was so lovely to be able to swap advice, ask questions, talk honestly and have a laugh at ourselves.

How blessed I feel reflecting on the past few days with complete gratitude.  And tonight I get to hang out with my biggest bestie in the whole world... my husband ahhhhh yay!  What a wonderful bouquet!

An unexpected gift!

A few weeks ago we gave away our double pram to some friends who are pregnant with twins. We totally did not want them to buy it from us and it felt so good just to bless them as there are so many expenses they will have in the next few months having to buy 2 of so many things.

Anyway I had totally forgotten about the pram (just glad to finally move it from out of our garage!) when last night my husband came home with a box of balloon flowers as well as a whole bunch of gift cards... a Village cinema movie voucher, Myer card, Bunnings card and Westfield gift card.  Our friends, knowing that we would not accept their cash, had gone and organised a "movie/shopping spree" night for us!  This was so unexpected, I was in shock but I was reminded that God loves to bless us when we give cheerfully.  If we give with a grudge or with grief over lost dollars, it's just not the same.  After initially being a bit mad that they'd given us so much I realised that it was okay to be gracious and accept what they'd felt was the right thing to do in return for the pram.  So that's my grat for today...for an unexpected blessing- so Westfield shopping centre, here we come!!!

Full on...

Today was rather full-on as I saw someone who had attempted suicide being picked up by the ambulance at uni and it really brought home to me the frailty of life and even of the human mind. I am grateful for all that I have in my life and the daily blessing of being alive. I am also grateful for a few songs that have been keeping me company the last few days while studying for exams, and really lifting my spirit!

Meke

You are not alone...

Singeldom sometimes hits you in great ways and in very ordinarary ways. After another birthday recently I have felt a little disappointed with how some parts of my life have turned out.  Well, ok, let's be honest, only one part- the rest is great!...relationships.  The dating game (insert cringe here!)
 
It's funny over the years my career has really developed, I have a good job, I earn a good living but I never really sought after this. It was never my priority.  Finiancially I'm independant and very blessed, which allows me the incredibly priveledge and joy of blessing others in return, but again I never really thought of this as a significant part of my life's journey- though it's a great honour to do these things. Singledom and this job allows me luxuries of travelling at times and I know this is a priviledge that many don't have so I am so grateful for this.
 
 I have amazing friendships, I am more-than truly blessed with the great women especially in my life. What legends they are. True warriors that jump in (and I with them) to the joys and trials of life with me. God has blown me away with these quality women, I will never be able to thank Him enough for them.  In this area I am humbled beyond words.  I have a family who I adore. I am so proud of all their strengths and achievements and being an Aunty has brought unspeakable joy into my life. 
 
For my birthday 3 of 4 of my nephews/niece drew and sent me pictures- the fourth can be excused cause his only a baby- lol!  But these pictures were the very best present that I recieved for my birthday. Why? Cause of their worth to me. The unconditional love of a child.  They all even 'wrote' me something on their drawings- well ok, their mums wrote it but the words came from the mouths of the kids. How I understand why God loves the little children so much! How precious they are.
 
 
Relationships- as in that whole boy-girl, Adam-Eve one- though have kind of exuded me.  I cringe at the thought of bringing "another" potential suitor (LOL) home to meet my family. (ps family reading this- I dont have anyone at the moment so breath easy crew!!) I wonder if they think "here we go again". I'm tired of the dating game, the "two days waiting period" before a boy calls, the "wondering if I look good in this feeling" and the "does he really like me feeling".  Can anyone identify with this?
 
I'm SO totally over it I can't even put it into words- which for those who know me well- is rare!  I told a girlfriend the other day that I'm "checking out" of the whole scenario!  It's exhausting emotionally.
 
How funny is God though, because on my birthday, one of my girls sent me a text, not knowing this struggle that was going on in me, saying "remember God says 'I will never leave you'."  If only she knew the impact of these words.
 
Everyone struggles with something, I guess this is part of my walk at the moment.  Whilst I do feel completely washed up in this area, I do know- and I'm grateful- for the work that God is doing in my heart in this area.  I LOVE LOVE LOVE that I never have to give Him up; never have to second guess Him; never have to say "God, am I beautiful?" I love that I know He loves me, that He thinks I'm beautiful. As for the other side, well...if anyone's reading this out there that can identify with this- firstly, I'm sorry for your struggles! Secondly, know that you're not alone; and cling on to our God, the God of hope, of peace and of unconditional, unfailing love.

Tam

Double the FUN

My gratitude for today is for my friends little toddler who is the exact same age as my toddler. He is such a great kid and I had the privilege of helping them out today by babysitting him all day, 8am-7pm. He is such a delight to have around and what's more, the two toddlers are just such great friends it  never ceases to amaze me how well they get along. I basically didn't have to reprimand my daughter today AT ALL. I barely had to even entertain her as they both kept themselves busy playing together!!! So sweet. Then to top it off, all the kids had a big sleep in the middle of the day meaning that I was able to make a meal for my friend who has just had a baby. After they woke, I went for a walk with the kiddies to drop it off with a stop off at the park for good measure!!!! Ahhh what a lovely day all round. 

A weekend full of grats...

Today: I am so excited about the trip we have planned in July.  We are going to visit an orphanage in Chiang Mai that rescues children that are in danger of being sold into the sex trade or trafficked.  We have been emailing a few of the people that work there over the past few months and now that our airfares are booked, accommodation organised and new passports have arrived; I am feeling so ready to go.  My husband and I seem to be talking about this upcoming trip all the time and I am grateful that it’s all set in place.  I know it will be a life-changing experience and I am so thankful that we will be sharing it together.  I feel a huge sense of gratitude for the founders who gave up their successful business in the US to start this worthwhile work. Through their selflessness, children’s lives are being dramatically transformed every day.  What an awesome testament to their characters and such an inspiration and privilege it will be to meet them.

Sunday: At my church on Sunday we had an awesome guest speaker.  My 7 month old slept the entire service in my arms (we’d forgotten to bring our pram) so I got to hear every word and it was really interesting.

Saturday: We had a busy day with a family photo shoot and minding my niece but I am grateful that our children were so perfect whilst having their photos taken… they were really working the camera LOL and it was so cute to watch.  I am also thankful for my precious husband who helped out more than 100% of the day.  He is so wonderful with the children and with an extra in the house (4 kids under 4) it was so great to work together as a team.  I also really appreciated not having to cook dinner that night and then chilling out together for the night.

Friday: I am so grateful that the hairdresser I saw (different to my usual one as she was sick) refused to cut my hair.  I know this sounds odd but I told her I was trying to grow it but I wanted a little trim just to shape the mullet style that had developed over the past few weeks.  After some coaxing she agreed to thin it out but not take any off the length so that in another 2-3 months it will actually be starting to get past this stage.  I felt a little disappointed initially but after a few hours I was really glad that she’d not cut it short again and I that after some months of frustration at the ‘non-style’ I have been sporting there may actually be some hair grown back to do something with soon.

 

Break A Leg!

Yesterday we held auditions. We had had an overwhelming response for the roles that we were casting for and so yesterday was our chance to pick and choose best ones we wanted...and what FUN we had in the process!!!!!!!! I had one of the best days ever - thanks to my amazing hubby who had organised the whole thing so brilliantly. Between his entertaining personality and the hysterical casting agent who was there to share her much needed experience ... it was a laugh a minute, so throw in some great personalities who auditioned plus some real fizzers and you can see why our day was so much fun.

As my hubby said to me afterwards..."was that not just your perfect day, getting dressed up, sipping hot drinks all day with yummy food, getting to analyse peoples strengths and weaknesses and having lots of laughs?" - Yep that about summarizes what I love to do most!! LOL

So the day could not have gone any smoother or better. The facilities we hired was phenomenal, just perfect! All the staff loved it's trendy, warehouse style and image and it made all the difference to our overall experience. The people we hired it from were just the most perfect hosts and really made us feel comfortable, looked after and were a lovely addition to our day. I must say this experience has just been so incredible. And now I am happy to add that we have selected about 18 people who will be fantastic presenters. Yep, it's been busy but OH has it been worth it! Now to look forward to next Saturday when we get to film them all - and the fun continues:) Yeehaaaa

A simple grat!

My grat today is just simply for all the jobs I got done. I had some things I needed to pick up from a particular shop at Chadstone (which I usually avoid going to with the children because it is so busy) as well as go to the post office and get our passports plus the usual running around with swimming lessons, getting dinner, tidying etc.  The children were all legends and really helpful and cooperative.  I had a great day and night (editing photos and playing on the computer!)

Two BIG grats!

My grat for today is for my daughters beautiful guinea pig, 
affectionately referred to as Miss Piggy. She accomplished the most 
mammoth task of giving birth to seven babies this morning. What a star 
- after giving birth to two children I just have the utmost respect 
for her each time she has a litter...but I mean SEVEN?! Wow...I am 
impressed!!! And they are just so tiny and cute - what a wonderful joy 
to be apart of this miracle! Not to mention that my daughter who is 2 
simply loves her piggies more than life itself and has so much 
nurturing love to give to those around her that her piglets help her 
to express that love without driving the rest of us a bit bonkers! The 
piglets get carted around in baskets and prams and they love it (so I 
like to think anyway) and I love it because it is the ONLY TIME my 
little one will play on her own for a period of time longer than 3 
minutes!!!!!!

I also need to grat and say that I am grateful for the fact the my 
little baby (who is 11 months) has started going to sleep day and 
night, without crying!! She has done this on and off throughout her 
life, but since her scream is just so bloodcurdling, I really love the 
times when she is happy to go to bed and doesn't protest loudly!! Its 
been a few weeks now and I am just loving the peace and quiet ..... 
hear that...no? That's cos it quiet shhhhhhhhhh!!

A new day!!

You know it is amazing that two days can be so very different when you have kids.

Yesterday was one of those days that I could happily pretend never took place!! My toddler woke up super early and super disagreeable.

By 9am she was back in bed, the only thing I could do to try and stop the wirlwind of hostility that she was unleashing on myself and her little sister. I can't say I myself was perfect. In fact last night before bed I said to my husband...gee I am glad tomorrow is a new day and I can start again!

And you know what, today has been a such a different day. Quite relaxing and enjoyable, I can't say I am missing the tantrums, no siree I am not! My gratitude is that today IS a new day and that it has been a FAR better day than yesterday. I am also grateful that my toddler is as forgiving of me as I am of her faults and that we are back to being besties again today. LOL

"Bean" there, done that!

I have been wanting to make some little bean bags for the kids to throw around for ages and today I finally got out my bag of material and sewing machine and made them.  I am thankful for the hours of fun we got out of playing with them and how much all the kids were so into them.  When my husband got home from work he also liked them so much he's put in his order for 5 of his own to juggle with LOL!

To top it off when I was putting my 3 year old to bed tonight (I always try to whisper the kids a secret- something to build them up and just encourage them) after I'd told my secret, he pulled me close and whispered in my ear "thanks so much for the bean bags, you did good job making them Mum".  How cute!

Old Mother Duck went out one day, over the hill...

There’s a park near our house that I refer to as the “lake-park”.  As its name suggests, it is a lovely little park area with a small lake, bridge and some play equipment.  In the past it was one of my favourite places to walk to as there were friendly ducks that used to waddle around everywhere and we would often see turtles and other interesting things there too. 

Unfortunately, due to the drought, the lake dried out a while ago and a local resident informed me that it was just terrible because all the creatures that had lived in the lake like the eels and fish etc were all left dried out, dead and exposed (there’s always some older people wandering around who live close to the park...and they love a chat!)

Anyway so the locals called the council who came to remove the dead lake-life and all that was left was a dried lakebed.  For this reason I had not walked to this park for quite some time but for some reason yesterday I decided to.

As we approached the park I was explaining to my son that there aren’t ducks at the park anymore but that we could just have a swing and a play.  A little old lady was walking close by and smiled at us and then when we had stopped at the play equipment approached me to have a chat.  In conversation she mentioned that in fact there was one duck that had just come back to lake and laid her eggs (out of season) and that if we looked carefully, we might actually see her ducklings.  Well I was very excited and sure enough about ten minutes after the lady left a mother duck and her ten little ducklings ventured out of the reeds and paddled around in the tiny amount of water that the lake had in the bottom.  Now the ducklings must not have been more than a week old.  They were very small and absolutely adorable!  I sat there with my small children for about 15 minutes just watching the ducklings puddle about and marvelling at God’s wonderful creation.  What an amazing thing to see the mother duck and her little ducklings surviving in such a small amount of water.

As we were leaving an old man, who had wandered out of his house to check on the ducklings told me with pride a little bit more about the newest family in the neighbourhood!  And how thankful he was for the last lot of heavy rain that had left the empty lake with a small amount of water but enough for the ducks to make a new home.  I left feeling so happy and delighted about the little ducklings and glad that they were bringing joy to the people that live around the park who pay attention to what’s happening there so closely. So I suppose my grat would be for the ‘new life’ and the seemingly small blessings and miracles that God sprinkles our life with that make it so interesting and rich.  I was just so glad that I took that walk to the park and that my children also got to experience first hand the wonder of God’s creation. 

Yummy Indian food...

I am not a 'food' person (much more of a snacker and not a real lover of fine food etc) but for the past few months I have had some serious yearnings for lots of Indian food esp butter chicken, tandoori chicken and garlic naans etc.  I absolutely love Indian and could eat it every night.  
So anyway, my grat for today is for Indian food (I am sitting here eating left over butter chicken from last night made in to a wrap with cucumber etc) ...for the delicious spices that they use AND for the fact that Dave seems to be just as "into" Indian food at the moment as I am so we seem to be eating a lot of it (prob not the healthiest of food choices but hey!) So yay for yummy Indian and lots of it!!

An oldie but a goodie.

Today I have just read my on-line devo about families and I am sooooooooooo thankful for my family.  I am thankful for the in-laws too but I am really talking about my maternal fam today.  I am always reminded by foster children of how much it means to have been brought up without divorce, abuse or neglect but...

I am so grateful for the wonderfully warm and caring parents that I have that did the very best job they could raising me even through times when I was rude, self centered, rebellious and ungrateful (I still can be but hopefully not as bad!).  They continued to love me when I was being unlovely and most of all pray for me when they didn't know what else to do.  They have been a continual source of strength, comfort and example of what it means to follow Christ.

For my sister Mel (beloved friend, comrade, confidant, fake twin, sounding board and probably partner in crime on many occasions) who is someone that I feel protective of, in the older sister sense, but also look up to for many pieces of advice.  She is so similar to me that there's so many activities we both share a love of and situations that we both find funny and yet so different that we can present each other with a differing opinion on issues, that the other may not have seen before.

Lastly my brother Tim who despite not having had contact with in the past few years is never far from my thoughts or prayers.  He is an intelligent, sensitive, gentle man with a quirky sense of humour who will hopefully reunite with our family one day and be able to see the many qualities that seem so obvious to me.

I am so blessed to have this family a treasure chest of memories past and new ones to make.   

Sisterly Grat

Today I am especially grateful for my sister who is just so wonderful 
to me!!! A sister who today, didn't mind coming over with her kids 
to keep me company, even though my daughter was unwell! She always has cool 
and sometimes crazy ideas (which I love)! I love that she challenges 
me in my faith and that we can talk about anything and everything. I 
am inspired by her in so many ways. Like the way she researches her 
little heart out and always makes such wise decisions based on that 
research. I am inspired by her determination and perseverance to 
constantly improve herself and her relationship with God. I love that 
I can ask her a million questions and get her advice on anything and 
that trusts me enough to ask things back. I also REALLY love that she 
makes me laugh so much that my pathetic excuse for a pelvic floor, 
practically gives way - and we all know what that means!!!!

I like this...

I am grateful for this excerpt that I read a little while ago in a very special book...which I typed out and put on my fridge.

It encourages me and challenges me on a daily basis as to why my alone time with God is so important. 

THE GREAT EXCHANGE

When I spend time with God I exchange my weariness for His strength, my weakness for His power, my darkness for His light, my problems for His solutions, my burdens for His freedom, my frustrations for His peace, my turmoil for His calm, my hopes for His promises, my afflictions for His balm of comfort, my questions for His answers, my confusion for His knowledge, my doubt for His assurance, my nothingness for His awesomeness.

Elizabeth George

Gratefulness

"If you learn to appreciate more of what you already have, you'll find yourself having more to appreciate." -Michael Angier 
The word appreciate has several meanings. One is to be thankful or show gratitude. Another is to raise or increase in value, such as how a good investment appreciates with time. I think that by appreciating and practising gratefulness, the things we have and want in our lives also increase. 
In our hectic, fast-paced lives, it's easy to forget about the many things for which we have to be grateful. We tend to be goal seeking, achievement-oriented people. 
And there's nothing wrong with that. 
However, it's vitally important that we not lose sight of the things that are near and dear, things we all too easily take for granted. 
What we focus on expands. If we focus on the problems in our lives, they tend to increase. If we focus on the good things we already have, they too, have a tendency to grow. 
I see it as another form of prayer. When we worry and fret over things, we make them bigger than they really are, as well as attract more of the same. That's negative prayer … prayer in reverse. 
Focusing on what we HAVE and what we WANT "appreciates" these things-they grow. 
Just before going to sleep each night, my wife and I share at least three things for which we're thankful. We call it doing our "Gratefuls". It takes only a few moments, but it directs our thoughts on the good … on the things we wish to increase in our life. 
I suggest making the conscious consideration of your blessings a daily rather than yearly occurrence. If you do, you'll find them taking on an even greater presence.

(Source unknown)